Do you live in the Midwest?
​
Have you been trapped in your house with your child, who hasn't had school for the THIRD straight week because they couldn’t go back after Christmas due to 7+ inches of snow and ice?
​
And there’s no end in sight because it’s 12 degrees and potentially 5 more inches of snow is on the way tonight?

There’s literally no financial compensation for this, and in fact you’re probably PAYING for it in decreased productivity, lost sleep, and years shaved off your life from the 3 Alani’s you consume each day just to survive.

Last night, Jameson and I stayed up late talking, just to hang out because it's hard to hang out with your spouse when you have a 7 year old third wheel (this is a joke, we're obsessed with him)

And at one point I meant to say "At the end of the day, when he's finally in bed, I just want to lay around and decompose" when I really meant decompress.

But then also, decomposing doesn't sound terrible?? (That’s also a joke)

The circle of life aside, I really thought the first Monday of 2025 would feel like my fresh start, but instead I feel like I’m living in an endless hurricane of the week between Christmas and New Years, but with way more shit on my to-do list.

TikTok is helping me feel better about that though. I keep seeing videos about witches. Probably because I am a sucker for a good tarot reader.

I am not a witch, I don't think, but something I saw the other day did resonate with me.

It said they're not concerned with January 1st about being a whole new you, they see winter as a time to go slow. A time to rest, and a time to regenerate, just like nature.

And honestly, that hits different when you're on day 21 of not knowing which way is up.

For the first time in a long time, I feel like I have the space to let my mind wander in the best possible ways. I've been writing more than I have in months.

If we don’t force ourselves into new and strict routines that we aren’t ready for, winter has this way of drawing us inward, making space for all the creative thoughts we're too busy to hear during the rest of the year.

I'll be honest — this isn't easy for me.

I'm someone who's always chasing the next goal, the next milestone, the next achievement.

Existing in the present moment has always felt somehow...insufficient. Like if I'm not actively building toward something, I'm failing

I hardly ever let myself be because I’m always thinking about what I’m supposed to be doing.

So here's what I'm learning in these quiet, trapped inside days — you can't undo years of white-knuckling your way through life with just a few days of Dramoine fanfic and clearance Christmas candy.

The exhaustion runs deeper than that. The recovery takes longer than we expect, and longer than we want it to.

And maybe that's okay. Maybe we need to acknowledge that after years of pushing and striving and constantly reaching for what's next, our minds and bodies need more than just a week at the end of every year to reset.

That we deserve and need real time. Real space. Real permission to move at a different pace.

So even though I really thought the first Monday of the new year would bring me some kind of magical refreshment, it didn’t.

I’m still tired. Still recovering. Still learning how to trust that creativity and inspiration can flow even when I'm not chasing them down.

And if you're finding yourself in a similar place, not quite ready for the new year's energy, still needing more time to just be, know that you're not behind.

Or if you are, I’m behind right there with you.

Stay warm (or don't, I'm not your mom),

Olivia

P.S. While I'm trying to embrace this whole slow-down-during-the-winter thing, I should mention that I have a 6am flight to Mexico on Tuesday. If this weather messes with my one chance to escape and hang out with a group of women that I friggin adore, all this peaceful winter acceptance is going right out the window.

And by window, I mean I will combust on the spot. The airport staff will literally have to vacuum up my ashes.

​